New Year's Eve parties are great, aren't they?
A festive and celebratory atmosphere, where family and friends gather to look forward to the start of a new year together. However, for those who have lost a loved one, these gatherings can become a painful reminder of the absence of a loved one. It is a stark reminder that that person is not physically here. There is an empty chair at the table. A chair that was once occupied by a loved one who is no longer physically present. That chair becomes a tangible symbol of loss. As laughter and conversation arise in the gathering, the absence of that person becomes even more palpable.
The first parties and gatherings without that loved one undoubtedly cause an ache in the chest and the sight of that person's empty chair causes the eyes to immediately fill with tears. There is a struggle between laughing and holding back the tears. In the end, you manage to get a smile on your face, but with tears streaming down your face. Seeing an empty chair can provoke too many things in a matter of seconds; one moment there is laughter as you recall anecdotes, but within seconds tears come as you remember the smile and the sound of that loved one's voice. It is a bittersweet feeling; there is sadness for his absence, but there is joy in knowing that he is well.
There is an empty chair, but there is a heart full of peace and gratitude. There is sadness, but there is also joy.
It may sound complicated or even unimaginable to think that in the midst of sadness there can also be joy. How is it possible to feel both feelings at the same time? For some, sadness can be so intense that they find it difficult to concentrate on anything else. Grief and sadness can become part of the daily routine. They may feel really depressed and drained of energy, affecting their mood, weakening them and creating a sense of utter hopelessness. Understandably, they find it hard to believe that in the midst of such sadness there can be moments of joy. And indeed, by oneself, by one's own strength, it is totally unrealizable.
That is where God's restoring grace comes in. When we are broken, hopeless, empty, discouraged and in great pain in our hearts, only God can bring restoration, comfort and joy. I know that is easy to say when you are not experiencing that pain or have not experienced something similar. But now, I say it to you with a broken heart that is being restored by God. I know how painful it is to see an empty chair, I understand perfectly what it means to be celebrating and at the same time have tears in your eyes and an ache in your chest when remembering that loved one. That is why I can tell you that it is possible to have joy even in the midst of pain. And it is not because of what you can do but because of what you allow God to do in you.
Perhaps you, like me, are going through some kind of grief. Maybe you lost someone very dear to you and now, when you see that empty chair, when you see their pictures, when you remember those moments by their side, your heart seems to break even more. Your strength seems to go and possibly sadness and pain want to take a leading place in your heart and mind, but, in that moment of weakness run to Dad's arms, run to God's arms and surrender to Him. Only He can bring joy to your whole being. And I don't mean that God will take away your pain or that you will stop crying every time you see that empty chair and feel that absence of your loved one. No, God won't take it away and not because He can't. He can.
But God wants to care for you, comfort you and embrace you in those moments of vulnerability and fragility. He wants you to witness His restoring grace and to see and feel how He can build up every part of your broken heart and broken spirit. God sees your despair and affliction. He hears your cries of pain, but He will do nothing until you recognize you condition and need for Him.
Jesus, God himself, recognized his condition and feeling, and expressed it:
Then he said to them, “My soul is overwhelmed with sorrow to the point of death. Stay here and keep watch with me.” Matthew 26:38 NIV
Trust in Jesus, and like Him, seek God in that time of affliction and pain
<< Jesus walked away, about a stone’s throw, and knelt down and prayed, “Father, if you are willing, please take this cup of suffering away from me. Yet I want your will to be done, not mine.” Then an angel from heaven appeared and strengthened him. He prayed more fervently, and he was in such agony of spirit that his sweat fell to the ground like great drops of blood.>> Luke 22: 41-44 NTV
Go and approach God, tell Him what is happening to you, because He is the only person who understands perfectly your feelings and emotions since He is the one who formed and created you.
Let God fill your heart with joy and peace in times of affliction, let Him act and allow Him to do His work in you.
When the pain of seeing that empty chair comes into your heart, don't give up. Please don't give up and seek refuge in God. Only He can embrace you in the midst of pain and dry your every tear.
Only those who surrender to their Creator can see that empty chair with a heart full of gratitude and joy for witnessing God's wonderful and incomprehensible grace.
“The Lord bless you and keep you; the Lord make his face shine on you and be gracious to you; the Lord turn his face toward you and give you peace.” Numbers 6:24-26
I wish that this new year the presence of God be with you every day of your life and that you experience the great love of Jesus in your life.
Happy 2024!
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